Ankylosing Spondylitis has taken a lot from me. It came into my life without warning and threw all my plans right into the garbage. It robs my days with the fatigue and pain it causes. It steals pieces of my life that I can never get back. So many things I loved to do that are just out of reach now. So much more I dreamed of doing that will never be.
It hasn’t ruined my life though. It did change it and I’m certainly walking a different path than I ever could have imagined. I’m not so sure it’s not the path that I’m meant to be on. For some reason I feel I’ve been dealt this disease for a reason beyond my comprehension. I am at peace with the fact that I have it. After all I can’t change it so all that is left is to find a way to cope with it.
So I will suck it up and deal the best way I can.
I will not let Ankylosing Spondylitis define me. I will find a way to live the life I want under my terms not what AS dictates. I will keep finding ways to blend the old me with the new me. I have things I loved to do that I will never be able to do again but I have had my eyes opened to new things I’ve learned I also love. I don’t want to say the door closing is a window opening as that is not always the case but it can be sometimes and I strive to find those occasions.
It’s not easy accepting this diagnosis and it’s even harder to find a way to live happily with it. There are always those times when it gets the best of me. That’s when I tell my self that AS may bend my body but will never break my will. I will keep getting back up every time it knocks me down. Even when I can no longer fight back physically. I will never surrender my spirit to it.
Stand tall my Spondy Family!