I’m not normally one to speak openly about sex to anyone and everyone out there in the cyber world but I know it’s important for a couple to have that connection as well as any other. If I’m truly going to try and help others this must be a part of it, right?
I never expected my very active sex life to be affected by Ankylosing Spondylitis, after all it’s just a back ache right? (Heavy dose of sarcasm there in case you missed it.) At first it was the pain and fatigue that crept between me and my husband. It was really hard for him to understand that a disorder of my bones and joints could take so much out of me. I was just exhausted and the idea of doing anything more than sleep was too much. Then as the disease progressed it was too painful. We both needed to find a solution to this as the idea of never having or enjoying sex again was simply not an option.
- I had to do my best to get my body back to a normal level of inflammation and as many of you know I can’t take traditional medications so this was not easy. It took a while to get it right but eating healthy and exercise helped me get there, at least close enough. You can read more about homeopathic options here. For more info on medication options check out what SAA has to say.
- I already focused a good deal of my time on range of motion but this was very important if we were going to have any hope for an enjoyable sex life.
- Don’t think you can only have sex from the hours of 9-11pm. Once the chronic fatigue mixes with pain and daily stress that’s just not going to happen. Instead of waiting for the kids to go to bed we enjoyed the time before they woke up or any other time we find ourselves together without interruptions.
- Most importantly…getting creative with different position. Ok, so this one was fun to figure out together. My hips really bother me and my spine locks up easily so we had to get creative but it was worth it! Enjoy!
Just like all things with AS it was not easy and it’s a never-ending struggle full of peaks and valleys but I’m not going to complain. Open and honest communication is vital in any relationship and it’s necessary for truly pleasurable sex. Discovering what worked for me and my husband brought us closer together and helped him understand my needs. I am happy to report I once again have a healthy sex life and don’t plan on letting Ankylosing Spondylitis get in the way!